"Inbreeding is how we get championship horses."
- Carl Gunter, Louisiana state representative, explaining why he was fighting a proposed antiabortion bill that allowed abortion in cases of incest.

"Most cars on our roads have only one occupant, usually the driver."
- Carol Malia, BBC Anchorwoman

"If you walk backwards, you'll find out that you can go forwards and people won't know if you're coming or going."
- Casel Stengal, former Baseball player

"The team has come along slow but fast."
- Casey Stengel, Baseball player/manager

"I think the team that wins Game 5 will win the series.  Unless we lose Game 5."
- Charles Barkley, NBA Basketball Player

"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."
- Charles De Gaulle, former French President

"Everything that can be invented has been invented."
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents,   1899.

"It's only puffy when it's swollen."
- Charlie Hough, Baseball player, describing his broken finger

"Rotarians, be patriotic! Learn to shoot yourself."
- Chicago Rotary Club journal, "Gyrator"

"As Deng's health is now failing, many matters have been passed to Wan Li, who despite his age is still alive."
- company report, China Inc.

"Football players win football games."
- Chuck Knox, football coach

"My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt."
- Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice.

"These people haven't seen the last of my face. If I go down, I'm going down standing up."
- Chuck Person, NBA Basketball player

"Most lies about blondes are false."
- Cincinnati Times-Star, headline

"Models are like baseball players.  We make a lot of money quickly, but all of a sudden we're 30 years old, we don't have a college education, we're qualified for nothing, and we're used to a very nice lifestyle.  The best thing is to marry a movie star."
- Cindy Crawford, Supermodel

"SUPREME COURT REULES THAT MURDERERS SHALL NOT BE ELECTROCUTED
TWICE FOR THE SAME CRIME."
- Cleveland Daily News, Headline

"Lack of brains hinders research."
- Columbus Dispatch, Headline

"Any person who shall lead or drive a bear upon any highway shall be fined not more than $50."
- Connecticut General Statutes, Section 6215

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